Nothing Says I Hate You like Socks

It's important that you have Friends to celebrate Chummas. If you don't have any friends, make sure that you made a lot of Cookies on the 17th.

Chummas is the traditional gift-giving holiday of the Chrischanukkahwanzaamas holiday. Chummas is the time when you give gifts to the people that you want to - and not the people that you feel compelled to give gifts to through either familial obligation or social pressure on the other gift-giving holidays. In other words, you don't give your Aunt Selma, your boss, or the mailman a gift on Chummas - just your chums.

Super Claus, the scantily clad super heroine, watches over Chummas. She makes the streets safe so that you can carry presents to your friends without fear of mugging. In the best tradition of four-color comic book heroes, Secret Chum (spandex and masks optional) is a great Chummas tradition. Battling with Super-Villains is a requirement though - and if you don't have any Super Villains handy, try catching a buzz with the chums and ripping into your boss or an old childhood nemesis.

Chummas Traditions

Within our crowd, we usually celebrate Chummas with a bad gift exchange - this year we had such highlights as fur-leg warmers, a giant badminton shuttlecock, a Christmas wreath made from yellow feathers, 2 live pigs donated to a Cambodian family, the complete works of Captain and Tenille, and an unmentionable 12 inch purple two headed pleasure device...

Feel free to share your crappiest gifts photos with us on our Facebook Group (and we have something for you to do with them on the 31st, the last day of Chrischanukkahwanzaamas).

The Super Clause

Super Claus is the The Spirit of Chummas. A scantily spandex clad super-vixen that flies around preventing holiday crime and mall violence. She is a patron to the geeky, nerdy fans of Chummas that are hoping that their friends buy them the gifts that they really want, and that they are unable to explain to their family (like cool tech from Think Geek, a Dungeons and Dragons module, BluRay movies, a mint condition Aquaman #35, etc.).

The Super Clause on the other hand, is the unwritten rule (well, now it's a written rule) that chums should never give chums "responsible gifts". It's the fucking Holidays man - if your friends can't buy you ridiculous, stupid, and silly stuff that you want - fo no reason other than "it must be mine", what is this world coming to. I don't care if your buddy really needs a new tire, or your chum needs new sheets for the guest bedroom - get them something cool! Black Manata action figures! Collectible tins of the Three Stooges! Star Wars Pez from the late 70's. Atari cartiridges! T-shirts emblazoned with Unicorn fucking a Dolphin. DVD sets of cancelled TV shows that had such promise. THe list is endless. DON'T LET YOUR FRIENDS DOWN!